The thing about writing is that inspiration is never a given. It was a depressingly low turnout following my last message and it certainly didn't inspire me to try harder. You know, after a while, I just figure that it's not worth giving a fuck about and I play video games and try my best to forget that there's something that I'm “supposed” to do. And so it's a vicious cycle with low turnout and even lower motivation.
But then, as I was drinking heavily and listening to music, someone actually went ahead and told me to write. It was the very same person whom I tell to write tengu lewds nearly every day but never listens. Yeah, the most active writer on the site after the broken spectacle that is yours truly: Moral. He had the audacity to tell me to go write. So write I have.
“The scent of awoo was in the air, permeating with bad analogies and cliché tropes.”
Both girls stared up at me, wondering just what the hell I was on about. Surely they worried about the possibility that I had a stroke, so good was their service. Both blondes were long since gone, their judgment final.
“I really don't care about any of this,” I said, “jesus fuck this is just one huge bother.”
I couldn't be assed to deal with their advances. I felt like having a stiff drink and forgetting the world for a while. Maybe I ought to go open a bar. No, that wouldn't really work. I'd have to hire employees to help out and chances were that they'd be more trouble than the were worth. I wasn't looking forward to not describing things properly either. I liked to talk about curvy hips and smooth skin. I felt that I'd have to forgo any of the fun stuff if I chose that lifestyle.
“What are you doing?” Mokou asked softly. I felt the two girls get up and follow me from the desk to the window as I stared out into the night.
“What I'm doing is not describing your very attractive bodies nor the erotic overtures being made right now,” I said dryly. There was no time for that. With the moon so full, I could only think about a lonely wolf howling, seeking a reply. Maybe I had been wasting my time all along. What my life needed was a bit more spice in the shape of awoo.
“What the hell is 'awoo'?” Kaguya asked.
“Sorry, I must have been thinking aloud,” I said, “it's a way of life, if you must know.”
“Sounds lame.”
“Seems to be all the rage right now,” I corrected her. And, rejecting my reality, I opened the window and jumped out. A life without awoo wasn't a life worth living.
“Jesus fuck,” Yukari said, not bothering to hide her contempt. Almost as soon as I jumped out, I found myself sat in a ruby-red room, with a thousand eyes staring right at my soul. “You really got to get a grip, you idiot,” she said, “I can't come and bail your ass whenever you do something stupid, you know. This isn't one of those conveniently-structured wish fulfillment stories, you know.”
“It isn't?” I asked, squeezing her left breast with the deft application of my hand. “Honk honk,” I said weakly, once again defying convention.
“It isn't,” she said with a scowl, slapping away my hand.
“Then what the shit am I supposed to do?” I asked.
“You're supposed to try your goddamn best, that's what,” Yukari said, flicking my nose for good measure.
“Vote for Momizi?” I asked.
“Christ, no,” Yukari laughed, “that's a waste of time. Everyone knows that Hataters is the best tengu. If you can't get her, settle for Aya. You'll want to eat crow, if you know what I mean.”
“Oral se-”
“Yes, yes, it's a clever innuendo,” Yukari interrupted, “now get over yourself and try to do something productive with your life.”
“Okay, but tail feels so good.”
“I'm sure,” Yukari said as she rolled her eyes. With a flick of her wrist, I was transported back to a familiar scene.
“It's rude to stare, you know,” Alice chastised, a light smile on her lips. Marisa joined her, smiling like I was the only one that wasn't in on the joke.
“Sorry,” I said, smiling sheepishly, “I just got distracted by a random series of thoughts.”
“Come on, we're having cookies,” Marisa interjected, “you can think about dirty stuff later.”
“You're right,” I said, not denying the implication. If I wanted more Kaguya and Fujiwara, I'd have to make an effort. It was a thorny and treacherous path I'd have to commit to. But the payoff, if successful, would absolutely blow the short fantasy I just had out of the water and into deep space. It wasn't exactly the type of thing that would happen all of a sudden while I was having cookies. That much should have been obvious.
“Mm, I don't know whether or not to be glad that you're at least honest about your perversions,” Alice chimed, raising an eyebrow. Didn't seem like she was upset, more like she was glad that I was making a spectacle of myself.
“Right, right,” I brushed the comment off, “I can't help it. I'm just happy that I'm here with the both of you.”
“Flattery isn't going to get you anywhere,” Marisa, shook her head adding a silent 'tut tut'.
“Should I turn the conversation towards something more embarrassing then?” I asked. “You both may be trying to act cool, but I think I could undermine your facade with a single observation.”
“Sounds like a challenge,” Alice said, sounding amused. “I know you well enough not to be shocked by your eccentric behavior. I'm not a wallflower you know.”
“Yeah, and I accept all your crazy perverted ways anyhow!” Marisa exclaimed, embarrasingly enough. As if realizing that she had left herself open for a comeback, she retreated into her seat, slumping down quietly.
“Well? How are you going to ruin this otherwise nice moment?” Alice asked, her tone somewhat acidic.
[] I was going to ask Marisa how she felt about sharing me with another girl.
[] Alice would kinda be happy if it was with another girl, wouldn't she?
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>>62461
Wiseman, you're an eternal stick in the mud. We've danced this number before so I won't get into the whole calling you out on this bullshit part of it. Just try to be happy and enjoy life.
>>62459
I really don't know man. All I know is IRC and those fuckers won't give me the time of day most of the time. Start there, see if you can do better than me.