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File 130836294829.jpg - (102.90KB, 431x601, pretend-this-is-a-clever-file-name.jpg)
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"Fuck Gensokyo"

It's the only thing that has been going through your mind for the past several hours. You sit with a miserable scowl on your face as you try to think beyond your hate and remember exactly how you ended in this horrible situation; kneeling behind a group of elderly old hags as they natter and rabbit on about gossip and other equally inane garbage, waiting for one of them to call for you and demand another sake. You would appreciate the polite tones and the manners some of the less plastered women offer you, but you seem to be a little too busy being bitter over being called a drinks monkey by the violet haired cow in the red dress. Embittered and more irritated then usual, you reluctantly take her order, muttering something about how stupid the snake rope... thing on her back looks as you leave the drinking hall to get her request.

You welcome the chance to get away from the rabble of wenches and their mind-numbingly dull chatter and bitchy gossip, if only for a brief period of time. Glancing around the kitchen you see that you are very much alone, and not even that younger girl in the green seems to be around. You silently thank your choice of deity for this moment of peace as you make your way over to the drinks and start to pour yourself something strong after shrugging off your favourite jacket onto the back of the chair.

"Hrm... come to think of it, I don't have a chosen god do I?" the thought ponders in your mind as you take a sip from the cup and welcome the ice cold beverage. "Maybe I should have someone, something to pray to when I get caught up in this crap..." you think to yourself as your earliest memories of this Gensokyo shit hole and the exact reason about your being here come to mind. You relieve those horrible mental images and repeatedly curse yourself and your frankly pretty shitty luck for your current predicament. As you finish your glass off, you scowl to yourself again and repeat your earlier thought train from before; "Fuck Gensokyo"

"Please mind your language" speaks a polite and quiet, yet noticeably annoyed voice from behind you. "And please stop drinking all of Lady Yukari's sake, that is what got you into your situation in the first place" it adds as the owner walks up beside you and pours out a few glasses. After you get over the nervous twitch you've developed since your first encounter with this 'Yukari' woman, you glance back at the shorter, silver haired girl in green and less then politely ask her not to say her name in your earshot. She sighs and gives you an apology, although she still reminds you to stop drinking all the sake.

"Listen Boo Boo"

"It's Youmu"

"Whatever, I don't care. Just don't tell me what to do all right?" you tell the girl as you manage to remain incredibly grumpy despite having a glass of the strong stuff to yourself. "I get enough of that crap from that bloody Yukari lady, I don't need crap from you too. At least she has a reason for telling me what to do" you remind her, although considering the twisted shenanigans you got up to that led to this situation, you're quite sure Youmu doesn't need a reminder. I mean, it was her rose garden that yo--

"Think of it as more of a suggestion to not drink it then Rosey" Youmu interrupts before you can remind yourself further of your little noodle incident, instead reminding you of the horrible nickname you earned. "I know we got off on a very bad footing, and I understand you're still very irritated, but I would like to try to avoid any more conflict" Youmu adds calmly, seemingly less then offended by your rudeness as she finishes pouring drinks. "Here, let me handle the drinks for now while you sit back here. Maybe having some peace and quiet might cheer you up a little?" she suggests to you.

"Fine, works for me" you say back with a sigh as you consider pouring yourself another drink. You continue to speak as you follow up on your consideration and try to pour another glass "I ain't gonna stick around in here for too long anyway so I'll be back around to help in a bit Boo Bo-- OW"

"Please" Youmu asks as she slaps your palm with the flat side of a short, oriental blade. You hate how quickly she seems to pull those things from no where. "Stop" she continues to speak in a stern and irritated tone, despite her willingness to try to get along with you, you still really get on her (debatably existent) tits. Before you can tell her not to tell you off about drinking the sake again, she interrupts you. "Stop calling me Boo Boo. My name is Youmu. Boo Boo doesn't even sound remotely like my name" she quietly rants.

"Would you rather I call you Yoo-Moo then?" you ask like the snarky git you are, earning your palm another swift slap. Rather than call her something unrepeatable and risk making her use the sharp edge, you opt to make a compromise instead. "OK fine, I'll stop with the Boo Boo stuff, but you have to stop calling me Rosey, I have a proper name too dammit" you whine as you rub your hand.

"Very well then, seems fair to me. Although I must confess that Lady Yukari never mentioned your actual name to me at any point. I'm afraid you'll have to indulge me" Youmu replies with a polite bow and a second apology. You curse Yukari's name under your breath for what is likely the eighth time this evening and rather than berate Youmu for it, you figure just telling her your name to get her out of your scruffy hair quicker will be the better option.

[---]

So then Anon, you're an alcoholic, Gensokyo hating Englishman* with an attitude problem. Aside from 'That bloody wanker', what name do folks call you?
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[x] Alister
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[x] That limey bastard
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[x] Gaylord Faglington

I have chosen this name after the grand tradition of naming the protagonists after their most readily obvious traits.
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[x] Alister
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[x] Alister
I like it.
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[x] Alister
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I hate to be a wet blanket--no hold on, that's a lie. Let me try again.

Get a proofreader.

There, I'm going to keep it nice and simple. Right? Get a proofreader. Or if you already have a proofreader, get a new proofreader. you're exhibiting a comma deficiency, for one. And dialogue has more closing punctuation then just quotation marks.

Seriously. Proofreader.
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[x] Tommy Atkins

Good British name
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[x] Yahtzee
The only Englishman from Australia I know.
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>>25754
This times ten.
[x]Cirno

There is no reason why not.
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>>25758
>[x] Cirno
>There is no reason why not.
Ignoring how wrong that statement is there is a reason: he's not the strongest.
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>>25759
>So then Anon, you're an alcoholic, Gensokyo hating Englishman* with an attitude problem. Aside from 'That bloody wanker', what name do folks call you?

Cirno is an englishman, who is also a drunk. Did you not know this? It's common sense.
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>>25754
Duly noted. It's been a while since I ever really wrote anything proper so thanks for the heads up

In any case, update


[---]

"So," the young lady asks, "your name then sir?"

"Randy Starfu--"

"Your real name," Youmu interrupts, not remotely impressed with your attempts to seem spontaneous and witty. You quietly answer more truthfully with a grumbled 'Alister,' neglecting to mention whatever your last name is, obviously because it's embarrassing and perhaps even vaguely insulting. Like Biggles. Or Twaithe. Or worst of all; Keith.

"I see, a very fine name," Youmu replies with a dim hint of a friendly smile. "Well then Alister, I would be lying if I said it's been a pleasure, but I hope you can relax for a little bit before you decide to join the others again," she adds before offering a courteous bow and making her leave, letting you be by yourself with the sake bottles. You sigh and glance at them before picking up your glass again, helping yourself to another shot to try and drown your irritation and think to yourself as to how you can get out of this predicament.

"At least she's not bad, beats having to compromise with that bitch in purple," you think to yourself as you glug down the whole pint without so much a second thought. Before you make yourself any more irritated, you decide to try and forget about Yukari for the time being, instead choosing to relax and think about things that you actually do like or enjoy the sound of. Eventually you grow bored of thinking about the Decepticons curb stomping Yukari and all her natterly little friends and make your way back to the hall in hopes that the unavoidable cheerlessness from simply being there will take your mind off the passage of time.

As you arrive, you find the party is still in full swing as a many of the hags around the table continue their incessant banter in between mouthfuls of sake and hot air. Sitting yourself back down in your earlier spot, you resume your earlier time killer of wishing for a swift death before one of the women at the table reaches around and suddenly grabs you in a head lock. Your miasma of hatred is apparently so strong it invites hostility without you even needing to open your mouth. It would be impressive if not for the possibility that you might be on the receiving end of a drunken beating.

"Hey girls!~" bellows the woman. Glancing beyond the impressive rack that is in your way, you recognize your attacker as Kanako; the apparent goddess of a mountain shrine here. She calls for the attention of the other hens around the table with a second shout and starts to share her thought with her acquaintances. "Since thish ish Al's first night here wish ush! What say we treat the little guy eh?" she shouts, waiting a moment before others around her raise their glasses and seem to agree with this. Whatever Kanako's little treat is, you are convinced that you are not going to like it. The fact even Youmu seems to be worried about you know does not help your increasing anxiety levels.

"OK then Al, sinch yous been such a good boy," Kanako speaks as she takes a large bottle of sake from the table and holds it up in her free hand. Your first impulse is to scream to Youmu for help, convinced she is the only sane and merciful individual here, but your mouth is suddenly clogged as your find the sake bottle shoved into it. "Here yer go! Drink it arl up Al!" the violet haired woman rants as she forces you to drink more and more to the sounds of cheering from her fellow raving madwomen. You appreciate the free booze but this old hag's gossip night turned all female frat party frankly makes you fear for your life and your liver, causing you to struggle like the fist of the North Star to try and escape Kanako's vice like grip. Unfortunately for you, whatever the Hell you are being forced to drink is some damn strong stuff, combined with Kanako's strength around your neck, you eventually pass out and regret not wishing harder for a swifter death.

---

"Alllll...Alllllllll..." you hear a voice call out for you in the darkness. "Alisterrrrr... wake up, wake up Alisterrrr," the voice continues to call, ringing out with a soft, almost cherubic tone as death finally claims you, showing no bias towards you as she welcomes you to the afterlife. You reach up to take her hands as the beautiful reaper lifts you from your mortal coil.

"Alister. Please let go of my face. It is a little creepy," Youmu asks you bluntly as your hand gently squeezes her cheek. As you suddenly come to, you let out a shriek and stumble back, still half confused as to what the Hell just happened to you. "P-please calm down Alister, you're alright now. You just passed out. Lady Yasaka insisted on treating you to sake. She... overdid it," Youmu explains before you have the chance to ask.

"Overdid it? I feel like my innards are pickled now, bloody Hell," you whine once more as you come to your senses and see that it is no longer night time. You must have been out of it for the reminder of the night would seem. You cannot recognize the room however as it is obviously not the drinking hall, you figure Youmu must have been kind enough to drag your scruffy arse to a warm bed and out of trouble for the night. "Oh, thanks for your troubles though..." you admit as you realise what she's done for you despite you being, well, you.

"Please, don't mention it," Youmu replies, "you may not deserve it but I still couldn't leave a guest laying on the floor in my lady's home. Honestly, you're kind of a safety hazard just laying there waiting to be tripped over," the girl adds as she hands you a cup of warm tea, adding that it should make you feel better and clear your head a little

"Oh, cheers Youmu," you say as you thank her for the drink and take a sip. The fact you finally called her by her name for once seems to make the snow haired girl smile a little. "So then, I take it the bitch in purple is still going to make me her dogs body again today to make up for what happened?" you ask Youmu as you try not to think too much of Yukari herself or the events of that cold, dark, debatably hilarious night. The girl nods to confirm your query after giving you a soft whack with the scabbard of her sword for your language. Youmu goes on to explain to you a little bit about the kind of things you can do today in your effort to make up for the rose garden incident.

"There are a few jobs today that you can do to try and make up for... 'that'," Youmu speaks, "you can help Rinnosuke at Kourindou, it's like a pawn shop for the rare and bizarre. Or you can help Lady Hijiri by looking after her family whilst she is away. Failing either of those, you can still maybe assist Dr. Yagokoro with a few things at her clinic to the west of here." As she finishes explaining, you take a moment to consider your options here. You've never met this Rinnosuke guy but taking into account he's not a woman, your misogynistic bastardliness dictates that you have a far better chance of getting along with him more then anyone else. On the other hand, that Hijiri woman didn't seem that bad, plus whilst you don't like kids that much either, you conclude that giving some brats a playmate for a while can't be all bad. As for that tall, silver haired woman in the silly blue and red dress you remember from last night... eh, you figure she might have some pure alcohol or something you can pilfer during your break time.

[---]

OK then Al. Another day, another reluctant odd job to make up for your noodle incident. What job you (reluctantly) want to try and do?

[ ] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his
[ ] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day
[ ] - Go assist the good doctor at... where ever her clinic is
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[X] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day.
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Ah, good old Youmu. The only sane person in the world, it seems

[x] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day
Rinno is a good choice, but he needs to get over himself. Thus, budhist lady land.
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[X] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day.
Alright, this seems like a good choice. So, I take it this entails watching over Nue, Murasa, and Nazrin with Shou helping us?
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>>25766
He really needs to be nicer to her as well with his Charisma stat being his dump stat, he'll need what few friends he can get.

[x] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day.

Might not be fun, but it might be a good shot at getting a sympathetic voice. I wonder what was it that he did in the rose garden exactly?
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[x] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day.

What other choices? I only see one.
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[x] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his
No. I'm going to piss all over this tide.
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[x] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his
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[x] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his

Get thee to a pawn shop, misogynist.
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[x] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day.
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[x] - Go babysit Hijiri's family for her whilst she's away for the day.
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[X] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his.

> the Decepticons curb stomping Yukari and all her natterly little friends

Screw that. Go all the way to Unicron.
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>>25782
I'd personally prefer it if the Autocons or the Deceptibots curbstomped Yukari's ass.

also aherp forgot the sage
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[X] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his.
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[X] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his
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[x] - Go assist the good doctor at... where ever her clinic is.

Not one vote for the good doctor? For shame, anon.
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[x] - Go assist the good doctor at... where ever her clinic is
Because doctors are AWESOME
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>>25825
We're under the impression the guy doesn't like her and the feeling's mutual, odds are working for Eirin will prove to be hell. In contrast, Byakuren hasn't treated him badly and Rinnosuke would know his pain somewhat.
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[ ] - Go help Rinnosuke at this pawn shop type place of his
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Apologies in advance for the wait, I really don't have anything resembling a schedule for this since I just write whenever I'm in the mood and not having my ass kicked by shitty, humid weather. At the very least, I'll try to aim for once a week but I'm not promising anything

Voting though I'll try to make more organised however. I'm gonna go with a first to five system with exceptions made if an anon suggests a [b]really[/s] good idea not present in the choices I give

But enough of my excuses and banter, have an update


"I guess I might as well try to help the hippy look after her kids I suppose," you answer to Youmu finally after some careful consideration of the options given to you. "Figure she'd need someone to keep her lot preoccupied whilst she's out hugging trees or something," you add before somehow being surprised when Youmu lightly whacks you on the head with her scabbard.

"I'd try and argue that Lady Hijiri simply loves the people around her but I have a feeling you wouldn't really listen," Youmu says with a sigh, "in any case, if you would like to get dressed and ready, then I'll show you the way to the Palanquin Ship" she adds as she sits up and starts to leave the room, giving you some privacy for a bit. Deciding to leave your questions for later, you make your way over to the spare pile of clothes that Youmu had been kind enough to find for you when the bitch in purple first brought you to Gensokyo. You pick up the simple brown pants and white, long sleeved shirt, actually rather thankful that you don't have to wear some kind of silly looking robe instead. You turn to the sliding door and from the hook on the wall you take your coat; a personalized order with the Decepticon insignia on the back that you got a few years ago in some contest of which the details you can't recall, regardless, it is a rather nice piece of attire and is among the few things you really treasure. Upon donning your favorite jacket, you make your leave from the room, and set off outside with a feeling of dread as you ponder what horrors could occur to you today.

---

"--and so long as you try not to be too insulting about Lady Hijiri, I am sure you will get along... OKish I guess..." Youmu finally finishes lecturing you as she has led you from her home in what she claims is the Underworld, all the way across Gensokyo towards your destination. As the pair of you reach your temporary abode for the day, even you cannot help but marvel at the sight of Lady Hijiri's apparent home; a vast ship of some kind (possibly a pirate ship you like to think), landed on the ground and turned into a makeshift shrine or temple of some manner. The mast and sails reach up high into the sky and do well to provide shade for anyone down below on the ground. Even after your time spent in both this land's underworld, and that bizarre, eye filled void of Yukari's, you are still rather impressed by the sight of the magnificent vessel.

"Wow... a grounded pirate ship with a crew consisting of hippies, sailors, rats, nuns and pussies," you finally say in the most tactless manner possible as you wonder if Gensokyo is less an eastern wonderland and more like the setting for a David Lynch film.

"That is one way of putting it, although I suggest you never repeat it," Youmu replies with a slight frown, "please don't refer to anyone by those names, especially Miss Shou, you'll make her cry..." she adds as she motions for you to follow her inside the ship. Upon doing so, you find yourself within a finely crafted and very well looked after wooden interior that is both tidy and welcoming. Glancing around at the fine craftsmanship of the main hull of the ship, you are suddenly greeted by a small, grey haired girl. She approaches you and Youmu, offering you a polite bow to you both before welcoming you to the ship.

"Hey there Youmu, nice to see you again," speaks the little girl, whom you now notice has large, mouse like ears on her head and a matching tail, "and oh? who's your friend here?" the girl asks before giving you a casual hello and friendly smile. As Youmu introduces the pair of you to each other, you come to the conclusion that this must be the Nazrin girl she mentioned earlier before. "I see, so this guy's gonna be our playmate for today? Cool~," she speaks as she welcomes you to follow her further inside. Upon doing so, Nazrin begins to introduce you to the few girls here in the hall, oblivious to your increasing feeling of dread as it dawns upon you that the women here are adults, and not easily dealt with kids. "OK Al, meet the family," Nazrin speaks as she points you out to the women in the main hall, calling them out to you as she speaks their names, "this here is Shou, she's kind of my boss here," the mouse informs you as she points you towards an almost disturbingly tall woman with gold hair, wearing tiger fur and what looks like a fancy lantern on her head. Upon closer inspection, you see that she has black stripes through her hair, making it seem like she didn't get the memo when the 80s died.

"H-hello there," Shou sheepishly replies with a shy, weak-willed wave in your direction. Youmu was right; for a tiger, she certainly does seem like a wimp. The little girl in grey points you towards a woman with a hood over her head, spinning a gold ring on her finger whilst using her free hand to hold a book of some description up for her to read. As Nazrin introduces her as Ichirin, the hood woman gives you a polite nod from her seat, offering you a soft-spoken welcome.

"And the girl in the sailor outfit is Minamitsu," Nazrin finishes as she draws your attention to a black-haired girl sitting in the far corner of the room, "careful though bro, she bites. A lot," the mouse warns as Minamitsu looks up from whatever magazine it is she's reading. She looks at you and unlike her companions here, she doesn't seem at all friendly; throwing you an almost venomous gaze.

"Hey Ballbag," says the brat in the most blunt fashion possible, "when are you making my bloody breakfast?" she adds, making it very clear in just a single sentence that the two of you aren't going to get along very well, if at all. At this point you can only hope Youmu was exaggerating when she said this Minamitsu character was a complete bastard. As Nazrin argues with the sailor girl and tells her she's already had breakfast, Youmu tugs on your sleeve to catch your attention before speaking up.

"W-well then Alister. You seem to understand who you'll be caring for today," your silver haired companion says to you, "I'll leave you to it then, unless you care for my assistance?" she adds. Looking at the women in the hall here, a little help from Youmu would be appreciated, especially with the mouthy brat still calling you a bellend and demanding her pancakes. On the other hand; if you can handle this job for the Hijiri chick on your own, then perhaps that'll look good on your half and score you a few more brownie points. As you think about it, it also comes to mind that you should choose which girl here to try and spend your time with, you might be a woman-hating git but you hate being bored and lonely even more. Thinking about it further, Shou looks like she could really do with some help growing a spine...

Two choices to make here Al; do you let Youmu stay with you and hope one of the only sane girls you've met thus far stops you doing something stupid? Or do you handle this scenario by yourself?

[ ] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[ ] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this

And what about the hippy's family? Who do you think needs some seeing to first on what you're sure will be a horrible, horrible day?

[ ] - The tiger needs to stop being such a scaredy cat, let's help her out with that (Shou)
[ ] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)
[ ] - I want to see what the chick with the ring is hiding under her hood (Ichirin)
[ ] - The bitch in the Donald Duck outfit needs to learn some manners (Minamitsu)

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[x] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this
[x] - The bitch in the Donald Duck outfit needs to learn some manners (Minamitsu)
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest

[x] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)

Naz for minimizing how painful this will be. I would vote to let Youmu go, but the way it's worded worries me.
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[x] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[x] - The tiger needs to stop being such a scaredy cat, let's help her out with that (Shou)

The donald duck suit' vote is really tempting... but no, I shouldn't.
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[X] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[X] - The tiger needs to stop being such a scaredy cat, let's help her out with that (Shou)

I really don't see a bad option here.
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[x] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)

Start from the ground up, I say.
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[x] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this

[x] - The bitch in the Donald Duck outfit needs to learn some manners (Minamitsu)

Needs more littleshrimp's meme.
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[x] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)

>"careful though bro, she bites. A lot," the mouse warns
By 'seems' I hope you mean 'is'. Naz is a fucking bro.
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[X] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[X] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)
I'm sorta tempted to vote for the Shou option, but I'm not sure that it'd go over all that well.
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[x] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this.
[x] - The tiger needs to stop being such a scaredy cat, let's help her out with that (Shou).
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[X] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest

[X] - The tiger needs to stop being such a scaredy cat, let's help her out with that (Shou)

I've always liked the shy ones. When you combine that with tiger-girl, it just wins. Funny how nobody's voted for Ichirin yet.
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[x] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)

>>25917
Isn't it sad, Ichirin?
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[x] - Yeah Youmu I wouldn't mind a bit of help to be honest
[x] - Let's try to be nice with the mouse girl, she seems kinda bro (Nazrin)
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[x] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this
[x] - The bitch in the Donald Duck outfit needs to learn some manners (Minamitsu)
No way THIS could end up badly.
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Ichirin Kujo
[x] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this.
[x] - I want to see what the chick with the ring is hiding under her hood (Ichirin)
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Nazrin - 7
Shou - 4
Minamitsu - 3
Ichirin - 1

I think it's time we got an update, mnyes?
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[X] - No way, you and your lack of a Y chromosome can sod off, I can handle this

[X] - The tiger needs to stop being such a scaredy cat, let's help her out with that (Shou)

i am curious to see what might happen
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>>25758
This is really late, but times 10? Really?
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Can someone take over a story that hasn't been updated after so long? I thought this story had potential.
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>>25967
You shouldn't take a thread over, but I see no reason why you couldn't start a new thread and copy everything.

Well. Except the hilarious lack of originality. But we're writing fanfiction, so clearly that isn't a concern.
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>>25968

Taking over a story for another writer without their permission is one of the most insulting things you could ever do, not just to the writer but to writefags and even the site itself on whole.

We may be writing fanfiction but it is still writing nonetheless. That, and be patient you fucktards. You deal with glasnost, surely you can deal with this.
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I apologise in advance for the long update time. As I said, I write whenever I feel like it and the most I promise is that I won't go months without an update

I'll spare you all the excuses of Writer's Block and being distracted by MvC3 and other rubbish and just give you lot an update instead


"Thinking about it, I wouldn't mind having you around," comes to your answer to Youmu finally, "I'll need someone to help me when the little shit in the sailor outfit tries to shank me or something," you add as the aforementioned sailor girl flips you off and calls you a cocksucker.

"I see," Youmu answers, completely ignoring Minamitsu as she continues to imply that your mother likes it rough and preferably from a horse, "I'm sure that despite Minamitsu being... Minatmitsu, you won't have to worry about her ever getting violent with you."

"Yeah, Youmu's right. The captain gets really lippy but the only thing you'd need to worry about getting hurt are your feelings" the mouse girl speaks up, "you seem like you can take some verbal abuse so I'm sure you'll be fine bro~" Nazrin adds with a smile as she seems to have picked up on how little the captain's words seem to get to you. Looking past Nazrin and at the captain, you are less then convinced. You're still quite sure that given the chance, this Minamitsu girl is going to try and break a bottle over your head or something else needlessly violent. "In any case then, enough about the captain, wouldja like me to show you around bro?" Nazrin asks you as she looks up at you. Glancing back at Minamitsu, you quickly accept the mouse girl's offer in a bid to get away from the captain and despite your usual abhorrence from having to follow a woman's lead; you follow along behind the girl without much of a second thought.

---

The grey rodent avoids taking you into any of the bedrooms for obvious reasons; however you were able to make a few educated guesses yourself as to who each door and room belonged. Things like the 'Shou's Room' sign and 'Minamitsu's Domain - Boatlights Only' were a massive hint. Nazrin goes through the trouble of giving you some brief explanations as to what goes on around the ship and what they all do here, however find it hard to pay much attention; both due to your usual ignorance but also some deep sound in the background that echoes down from one of the corridors.

"Yo, just to interrupt your little tour here; what's the noise?" you ask Nazrin without even looking in her direction as you instead gaze towards the abyss of the corridor.

"Hrm?" Nazrin sounds as she and Youmu both share your gaze and look the general direction, "oh, that's the engine treasure room" the mouse adds before continuing to explain a bit about the ship itself. "The look of this place isn't just for show; the Palanquin Ship is more then capable of flight. The captain's able to drive this thing all other Gensokyo, drifting across the clouds thanks to the golden engine down here. Impressive no?~"

"It'll impress me when this places transforms into Unicron and eat's Yukari's face" comes your reply, moments before Youmu hits you with her scabbard again for being rude. Your companion apologizes for your being a dick before asking her own question.

"Might I ask why you have an engine made of gold Nazrin? I thought this ship wasn't an actual treasure ship like people had believed" she asks the mouse as she slides her scabbard back to her belt line.

"Oh, Lady Hijiri figured that if we're still gonna call this place a treasure ship, we should get some actual treasure," Nazrin answers as you rub your head and start to become more and more annoyed by Youmu's habit of whacking you, "that and we kinda needed a new engine anyway after Nue hid the last one. Two birds with one stone and all," she adds.

"The captain must have had to suck a lot of dicks to get a hold of a solid gold engine for you lot. Would explain why the bitch is so salty," you blurt out, apparently having yet to meet your tactlessness quota for today, "Also who's this Nue girl?" you quickly add as you step back to avoid a blow from Youmu. However the well-deserved strike doesn't come, just as you ask about the mysterious Nue character, a white flash suddenly appears, leaping out from the shadows of the hallway with a high pitched, banshee-like wail! After the initial jump scare however, you and Nazrin quickly see that the white flash is just a white bed sheet with a monster face drawn on in permanent marker. You swear you've seen Scooby Doo episodes scarier then this.Your rodent tour guide sees the funny side in this terrible prank however and quickly unmasks your attempted scaremonger.

"Hi Nue~" Nazrin chimes as she removes the sheet, revealing a short, black haired girl with some rather odd looking... things, coming out of her back. She wields a humorously under-sized pitchfork and if not for the fact her face is severely lacking in punchability; she'd look almost like a younger version of the good captain Minamitsu. "Care to quit messing with the engine room a bit and trying meeting our guests rather then scaring them?" the mouse continues to say with a friendly smile as she introduces the girl to you and Youmu.

"Word," says the black haired child with a vague hint of mischief in her eyes that you already don't like, "Nue Houjuu. You?" she asks you in a fairly politeish manner. Even if she looks like Minamitsu, you appreciate that she seems to be of few words, doesn't instantly hate your guts and hasn't threatened you with grievous bodily harm yet. You introduce yourself, this time using your actual name, rather then give Youmu another reason to whack you for your dickery. "Cool. And your friend who I just scared off?" Nue asks you back. Before you can try and claim that Youmu isn't your friend, it twigs in your mind what Nue just said and you look down to your side to see that your snowy-haired companion has indeed seemingly ran off, so quickly in fact that you didn't even get to hear her shout in terror. For such a hard seeming girl, she must be a lot jumpier then you thought of Nue's terrible ghost costume scared her. You tell Nue to stay put and not do anything stupid as you take Nazrin with you, cursing less then quietly about having to look after Youmu too if she's going to be this much of a wimp, eventually finding the girl in green next to a laundry basket down a separate hallway, hiding under a blanket.

"Hey Youmu bro, come out from under there" Nazrin snickers as she crouches down and reaches out to lift up the blanket as you stand by. As she does this, you notice that you seem to have subconsciously carried the bed sheet Nue used as a ghost costume with you. Several thoughts go through your head at this point. For all the times she's hit you for speaking your mind, it wouldn't hurt to screw with her head just this once. However on the other hand, trying to be nicer to her might even out your karma a bit and lessen your chances of getting a whack later on. Either way if you're going to do anything, you best act quickly.

[ ] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around
[ ] - Put Nue's ghost costume on and scream 'OOGA BOOGA BOOGA' as Nazrin pulls the blanket off Youmu
[ ] - Do something else: __________________________________________________

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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around

I always found it ironic that Youmu is afraid of ghosts, yet is a half-ghost herself and serves a ghostly master.
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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around.

I'd rather stay on the good tolerant side of one of the few characters he's on good terms not on bad terms with.

Lord knows he's not going to be on a lot of those as long as he's a misogynist.
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[x] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around.

Maybe Youmu can break that misogyny eh?
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[x] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around

>>25969
I disagree. Fanfiction of fanfiction is not insulting in any way. Or, at least, not any more insulting than normal continuation fanfics.

but there's an update, so I'll shut up
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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket, but tell her that there is a ghost under there.
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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around.

The half-ghost scared off by a "ghost". How delicious.
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[ ] - Put Nue's ghost costume on and scream 'OOGA BOOGA BOOGA' as Nazrin pulls the blanket off Youmu

Stupid dog Youmu.
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[x] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around

Al's going to need all the help he can get.
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[x] - Put Nue's ghost costume on and scream 'OOGA BOOGA BOOGA' as Nazrin pulls the blanket off Youmu

OOGA BOOGA
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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around

If he's going to survive in Gensokyo as a normal (girl hating) human, he's gonna need at least one friend (read "non-enemy").
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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around
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[x] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around
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>>25974

That's not the point. Nor is that the intention. You're trying to "continue" a story for someone else, even going as far as shamelessly copying someone else's work. This is quite literally the textbook example of theft and even if it is fanfiction, theft is theft and theft is an insult to the victim.

My point is, stealing stories from another writer is bad and should get you banned for how bad it is. I wouldn't want someone else trying to steal my story and I doubt this guy would either.
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>>25983
I'm taking this to /blue/ to avoid shitting up this thread further.

>>/blue/4310

Cheers.
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[x] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around... except for a half ghost armed with two swords.
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[ ] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around

Underneath it all, isn't Al just a big softie with a drinking problem?
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[X] - Begrudgingly help Youmu up from under the blanket and tell her there are no ghosts around.

Can't risk anymore whackings
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I'll spare the excuses for the amount of time this took, so I'll just post this, hope you enjoy, then go back to sucking at Virtua Fighter

"Come on you wimp," you speak as you help Youmu up off the floor and showing some signs of decency and tact for once, "I didn't think a girl who carries three swords in tandem could be such a massive pussy." you add, instantly disproving the writer's assumptions. "Wait, how the fuck are you even afraid of ghosts anyway? Isn't your boss a ghost or something? Aren't you half a ghost or something stupid?" you speak up and begin to ask as you fail to understand this girl and the inner workings of her mind, although to be honest you never really grasped how any woman's thought pattern goes.

"Y-yes, t-that may be the case, but there is a bit more to it then a simple phobia of phantoms Alister" Youmu replies before she thanks you for your somewhat uncharacteristic display of gentlemanliness. "It is a long story but I'm sure you couldn't really care, so I'll spare you the details."

"Good," you reply rather bluntly before turning to Nazrin, "anyway, now that we've looked around this ship and I know the basic layout of it, what can I do for your little collective here to keep you quiet?" you ask.

"Yes actually bro, thanks for asking," the mouse girl replies with a smile, not at all offended by your bluntness, "since you're offering, maybe you can help me with finding a little something to replace the pagoda Shou has." she adds as she pulls out two long, black coloured rods bent at odd angles. "Just needed someone nice enough to help me find the real one and stuff" Nazrin finishes as she holds her rods up.

"If you wanted someone nice then you can fu--" you feel the handle of Youmu's sword jab you in the side, "I mean, what's wrong with the pagoda Tigger has then? Looked fine (if not horribly tacky) to me earlier." you finish, being one to talk about tackiness when you wear a long coat with the insignia of an 80's toy series on it.

"I imagine it's a fake one?" Youmu speaks up, "I know Miss Toramaru has a habit of losing the pagoda apparently." Nazrin nods to confirm such a fact, adding that your sword wielding companion is correct about it being a fake as well.

"Made it out of an old snow globe and some bits from an old doll house. Shou's too happy about having it back to notice the snowman still inside it." Nazrin explains. "As for the real one, I want to try and find that and replace the fake one without Shou knowing. Ichirin and the captain have been nice enough to help by making sure she doesn't figure out the one she has is fake" the mouse adds.

"Bet you had to bribe Captain Motherfucker though," you retort quickly, "what'd you give her? A leash to hold the nun on?"

"Not too far off actually, some old hardcore exploitation movie about lesbian nuns I found while dowsing for treasure once." the girl in grey replies rather bluntly, as though finding disgusting, hardcore smut from the ages of Hammertime Horror knockoffs and Colonel Sanders cameos just lying around somewhere isn't an uncommon occurrence.

"Y-you found... hardcore violent p-pornography... while dowsing for treasure?" Youmu asks, both confused and afraid, "and you used it to convince Minamitsu to help you?"

"Hey, one person's filth is another person's treasure. In this case that second person happens to be the captain" Nazrin shrugs in reply before turning back to you and pointing out the two black rods she holds. She quickly changes the subject and explains to you how her ability works. It seems that Nazrin is able to locate treasures and priceless items by dowsing for them using a similar method to the one idiots back home use to try and dowse for water underground. You don't believe a word of what she says but considering what this Gensokyo has been like so far, you decide to go along with this crap anyway. "Good, you got it. Now take these rods, normally I'd do this on my own but with some one else helping, I can cover more ground faster and have a better chance of finding it before Shou figures out her pagoda's a fake and start having a panic attack about it."

"Hrmm, sounds like a plan I guess, good to see someone else besides Youmu has her head on straight..." you mutter as you take the dowsing rods from Nazrin. The mouse girl offers up a second pair of rods to Youmu once your silver haired companion offers her assistance as well. "So then, exactly how far from here are you thinking this pagoda might be?" you ask your fuzzy little expedition leader.

"I'm guessing it'll be around somewhere in the Magical Forest since we were flying overhead there when it first went missing," Nazrin answers as she starts to lead the pair of you back through the corridor and lead you back outside the ship to the forest, "by the way, since you two are probably kinda new to the whole dowsing thing, you might wanna team up so you can help each other pinpoint it a little." she adds as your party stand outside the ship in the late morning sun

"Sounds like a fine idea to me," Youmu exclaims as she starts holding the rods up to see if she can start getting them to work, "you don't mind at all do you Alister?"

"Eh, I don't completely hate you and I guess having someone to argue with beats wandering around the forest alone like a prat." comes your tactless, but at least honest, reply. Youmu retorts, calling you a fine gentleman in a fairly deadpan manner as Nazrin starts to make her leave from the scene, wishing the pair of you good luck, as though she is oblivious to the tension between you both.

---

It is only a brief amount of time later, but Youmu and yourself are now somewhat deep into the Magical Forest after a few minutes of wandering, waiting for your dowsing rods to start reacting to any near-by treasure that may lay hidden beneath the soil. "You know I'm starting to get the idea this whole dowsing thing is a crock of shit," you moan as your rods fail to even wobble in the slightest, "might as well drops this shit now because these damn things aren't going to work any time so--" you begin to add before both your rods and Youmu's suddenly spring to life and start to wobble, however both towards slightly different directions...

"It seems we are better at this dowsing art then you gave us credit for Alister," Youmu smiles, trying not to smirk at the fact the rods only seemed to move just to shut you up, "however it seems we're locking on to two different things here..."

Decision time Alister. Who's rods do you suggest the pair of you follow? Yours or Youmu's? Or maybe you're getting fed up of all the female company you've had all morning and you'd rather go your own way?

[ ] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction
[ ] - I'm a man and I know what the fuck I'm doing, we follow my rods direction
[ ] - Might be worth separating so we can check both directions at once I guess

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[x] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction.

Success before pride.
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[x] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction

Their relations is funny. I want more.
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[x] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction
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[X] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction.

The faster he gets done the faster he can get to relaxing.
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[x] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction

Going with the flow.

I like this stories characters ASIDE from Douchebag in Gensokyo-like MC. At least that story had an MC with a big ego, not just a plain out prick. All he does is curse and bitch and whine about everything and how shitty it is. Kinda like me. You know. When I was eight. And the god damned periods man, You keep forgetting them!
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[ ] - Might be worth separating so we can check both directions at once I guess

Pissing against the tide.

Also, the anons earlier in the thread are still right: You need proofreading badly. This update was almost painful to read due to the misuse of punctuation.
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[x] Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction.
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[x] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction.
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[x] - Might be worth separating so we can check both directions at once I guess
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[x] - Might be worth separating so we can check both directions at once I guess
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[X] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction

Being in the Forest of Magic alone as a normal human is my only concern at the moment.
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[x] - Youmu's more focused on this shit then I am, might as well follow her rods direction
Sure whatever let's go
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[x] - Might be worth separating so we can check both directions at once I guess

The pagoda has either split in two, or ours is pointing us to a stash of booze. It's all good.
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[x] - Might be worth separating so we can check both directions at once I guess
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ssib19
I guess I should let the cat out of the bag. No, this writer wasn't me, but a friend of mine I may or may not have pressured into writing here. He had a good idea for it, but I think somewhere along the line he realized he couldn't follow through with it or just otherwise lost interest. He has a lot going on too, which factors into it. In the end, I just chalk it up to someone who wasn't ready for steady writing trying to do so.

He mentioned to me a while back that he had no plans on continuing this, so you can mark this story as abandoned or scrapped.
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>>26317
It takes more than merely a good idea for a story to last.
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>>26317
Oh well, thanks for telling us.

Tell him it was a nice story and he's more than welcome to try again later if he fancies it.
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